What Does It Mean to Be Successful? A Story of Two Triangles

The Achieving Triangle

To be successful in our society, you work your way up to the top of the Achieving Triangle. This is an idea that permeates workplace success, school (grades), and many other facets of our modern thinking.

A large group of people begin at the bottom of this triangle, and there is a lot of room. From there, the space gets smaller and smaller, causing people to fall off the triangle as you work your way up to “success” at the top.

Who are these people falling off? Maybe one is the kid who quits highschool to work at an automotive shop, another is labeled “special needs” because he doesn’t comprehend concepts in school as quickly as his peer etc. People who fall off become “losers” and those who make it to the top are labeled “winners.”

If you make it to the top of this ladder, you could own a Tesla, live in a large home, take vacations etc. You have it all! The problem with this “achievement triangle” is that it engenders an attitude of competitiveness, ruthlessness, comparing to others, and believe you are smarter than others to make it to the top of that triangle. Those who fall off as the ladder narrows usually develop resentment or hostility to those who stayed on the triangle. They see themselves as the victim, and often feel depressed.

The Becoming Triangle

But this “achievement triangle” is a lie. The truth is that there is room in the world for all of us to be completely “successful,” but we must use a different definition of success. There is another triangle—The Becoming Triangle. In this second triangle you don’t have to compete with anyone else’s genius; or be better or stronger or smarter than anyone else. The child who was labeled “special needs” and the mechanic each have enormous potential.

The Becoming Triangle is a right triangle, and by definition has a 90 degree angle at its corner. The angle is important, because it represents your allegiance (more on this in another post).

In life, people choose one of four main allegiances:

1. Having/Self/Ego

2. Impressing/Others/Insecurity

3. Bad/Hate/Anger

4. Good/God/Love

If we choose allegiance to 1, 2, or 3, we automatically choose the Achieving Triangle. Only Good/God/Love can be our allegiance in the Becoming Triangle. See, this allegiance is everything; by definition the right triangle is based on a 90 degree angle.

The Becoming Triangle has three sides:

Character — your ability, vision, and mission

Competence — your skill level, things you can do, and what you know

Capacity — which is the culmination of all your resources — your ability to impact the world.

In this triangle, your character and competence combined, equal your capacity. The nice thing about a right triangle is that these are squared. As you increase any one of your skills, knowledge, abilities, or vision your capacity EXPONENTIALLY GROWS.

In the becoming triangle, you have LIMITLESS POTENTIAL. Your success is defined by your ability to turn your resources into something beautiful. If you increase your knowledge (originally 2 squared = 4) by one (now 3 squared = 9). Now you have much more capacity to make an impact on the world.

What you have is temporary but what you become is permanent. We read stories of amazing people who are subject to horrible circumstances in prison camps (such as Corrie Ten Boom and Viktor Frankl) who state “you have have my body but you cannot have my mind” - Viktor Frankl. You have power to become what you want to become. Though others mock and ridicule, you choose to stay true to your allegiance, Good/God/Love.

The becoming triangle is the Real You.

Before you go setting goals without direction, find out God’s plan for you. Then be who He wants you to be and you won’t be disappointed.

Determining Your Allegiance is CRUCIAL!

Your allegiance is the most powerful thing in your whole life because it is the driving force behind virtually all of your actions, choices, and even thoughts. If you choose your allegiance well and then stick to it, you will be a great success in life. It is that powerful.